Parents Treating Their Children Based On Their Exam Grades Is A Disaster. Here's Why!

Ensuring that your kids understand that getting good grades is something you demand of them isn’t always the right thing to do. Studies indicate that children could perceive these demands as pressure. And they don't succeed when they're under pressure to perform. Children's perceptions of what their parents desire for them can have a big impact on how successful they are in the future. Pressure from parents to do well might make children more vulnerable to stress and negatively affect their well-being. This is particularly true if parents place a higher priority on accomplishment and grades than on traits like kindness, empathy, and social skills. Read on to know why parents shouldn’t treat their children according to their exam grades.

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The effect of treating kids according to their exam grades

Pressuring the kids

Children who believed that their parents valued success over showing kindness towards other people were more likely to suffer from negative effects, such as anxiety, despair, low self-esteem, behavioral issues, parental criticism, difficulties in school, and poorer grades.

Getting the opposite result

Whenever you treat your child with kindness once they get high grades and do the opposite when they get lower grades, they will get confused. Moreover, doing so can result in unfavorable outcomes. The more you stress your child to get higher grades, the more likely they will fear and fail to do so thanks to the pressure put on them.

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Affecting your child’s psyche

Parents who overemphasize extracurricular activities and grades are undervaluing compassion and social skills. Consequently, parents might be a part of their kids' inability to grow up to be well-adjusted adults and valuable contributors to society. During a child's formative years, parents who are just focused on getting good grades are producing significant amounts of tension and anxiety. Children who are taught kindness and compassion do better in school and succeed more academically, according to research.

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How to encourage your child to do better in school?

It's completely acceptable to motivate children to give it their all. Parents who push, criticize, and convey the idea that children must succeed at all costs or that exam scores, rather than healthy interpersonal relationships, should determine a child's self-worth are problematic. Therefore, there should be different measures taken rather than stressing exam grades.

Don’t focus on hard work

It does not help to exert pressure on your child if you are a hardworking, well-paid parent with a successful career. You don’t have to keep telling them that they need to obtain good grades—your behaviors set a clear example. Instead, show your children that they deserve to be proud of their finest accomplishments and be there to assist them when they run into difficulties.

Winning isn’t the ultimate goal

There is no escaping the message that the world is sending to kids: they must move quickly and improve. It's more crucial nowadays for parents to emphasize moral principles and provide a secure environment where children feel supported, especially in light of the pressures students already face to succeed.

Encourage don’t criticize

Making negative comments about children's performance and concentrating on their flaws is a surefire method of damaging their self-esteem. As an alternative, assist your kids in problem-solving techniques and express your pride in their work. Instead of being pessimistic and dwelling on the problems, be upbeat and assist them in seeing solutions.

Be consistent in your approach

If you assure your kid that you'll be okay with them trying their hardest, but you then get upset with them when they don't get an A+ in every class or you blame them when they don't succeed, this will have negative consequences. Keep in mind that, particularly when it comes to children's views, actions frequently speak louder than words.