November 28, 2018 12:12 PM | by The Fustany Team
Realizing That Your Depression and Anxiety Can Affect Your Partner
When you're struggling with anxiety or depression, your mind is sometimes too tired and overwhelmed to think about how it could be affecting people around you. Worrying too much about that and feeling guilt because of it will only do more harm and affect your mental health greatly. Trying to heal and come out stronger means you need to focus on prioritizing yourself. However, when you're in a relationship with someone, it can get a bit complicated.
In relationships, which are a partnership, when one side is struggling and in need of comfort and support, the other half might start to feel a bit overwhelmed. Of course, your partner should be your strongest, most supportive force when you're dealing with depression but have we ever stopped to think how hard it must be supporting a partner with depression? I'm not saying this to guilt trip you, it's only a form of awareness to help you both come out stronger at the other end with better communication and understanding of each other's personalities and what they need when going through hardships.
1. They could be in denial that you're going through depression
Your partner could be in denial that you're depressed or dealing with severe anxiety. With more awareness being raised about mental health these days, it scares a lot of people seeing the ones they love in pain. Imagine the most intimate relationship you have and with the love you share, how hard it is for him/her to see you going through this. Try to understand that, when they start to normalize it or tell you that what you're going through is normal and that they understand how you feel. Although, for you this might be hard to process because no one knows exactly how you're feeling or the severity of it, your partner is just trying to make sense of it because to them it might be too painful to see you going through this.
2. They don't know the right thing to do or say
You're trying to make sense of all your emotions and feelings and it's definitely a challenge, so in order for your partner to understand, it will take them a while. There are a lot of articles that talk about how to support a significant other coping with anxiety and depression. You can also try to communicate as much as possible how you're feeling in a more organized manner. You can also tell them quite literally what you need and expect from them, instead of just having expectations, tell them this is what you want to hear, this is how you want them to hold you and this is when you need to be left alone. If you go to therapy or counseling, you can have them attend one or two sessions with you. Getting an insight and seeing a different perspective with your counselor's help can give them a better understanding of your side of things.
3. They can get overwhelmed after a while
Mental health is a very common issue that is sometimes hard to even recognize. Your partner could be also dealing with a lot of stress and anxiety and sometimes they won't be able to fully be there for you 100 %. Try to think about them and what they can be feeling. When you're venting or feeling really down around them, that negativity could most probably transmit to them and they could be in a place where they too are tired and in need of understanding and support from you. Yes, I know this might sound hard and difficult given you're already in a sensitive state of mind, but try to remember that they've been here for you all this time and one or two days do not mean they don't get you or are being non-supportive and selfish. It just means that they got overwhelmed and probably feel really bad about not being their best selves for you. So taking a step back and seeing them separately from the situation will help you empathize and even both be there for each other to power through this difficult time.
Communication is everything when it comes to relationships! Whatever's on your mind doesn't have to be on theirs automatically, so try to talk as much as you can until one day you wouldn't have to anymore and they'll understand you with just one look. Good luck and stay strong.
Main Image Credits: Instagram @benjaminpatch
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