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| by Mohamed El-Dib

How to Keep a Man from Walking Away

Hello again, beautiful ladies!

It is always good to be amongst you, even though we are not directly interacting. But I noticed that some of you followed me on Instagram after my last article on Fustany, which gives it all a degree of depth.

Alright then, let’s get to our core topic. Men are a lot simpler than you probably think. We do not need to go around in circles to tell you something, we do not need to give or receive hints to understand. On the other hand, women are usually more philosophical in their approach to things. I believe that these differences in approaches are the roots of all evil. All love is lost in misunderstanding. Anyway, below are some tips to prevent your man from walking away.

1. STOP THE DRAMA!

I wrote this one in caps on purpose. I guess that as a man myself, I will never understand why ladies like to be over dramatic about things. Life should be a lot simpler than that. We both want to be happy, and we both want to make each other happy. Why do you have to complicate things and create stories? I’m not talking about crying, because no man should ever make a woman cry, I’m talking about the unnecessary change of plot when you’re not getting what you want. You know what I’m talking about.

2. Prevent things from being “the same.”

This one is not very easy because psychologically, most women like to be similar, while most men like to be different from everyone else. (This does not apply to fashion of course, because comparing two women wearing the same dress with two men wearing the same suit automatically throws my theory down the drain!) I’m talking about how most women want to go to certain places, “just like other couples do.” Or how they want to fit in. While us men, we were made to do our own thing. So please please, make us feel that there is a little challenge in things we do. Please please break the routine.

3. Don’t get in the way when it comes to boys’ time.
We’re always with you. We love you. You are everything to us. But we like to have our own time with the boys every now and then. Don’t ask why, we just like these outings where there are less hormones sometimes.

4. Don’t turn the table on him.
Every time we have a conversation and you try to turn things on us, we cringe a little. “Did you mean to tell me I’m fat?” No baby, even if I think you’re fat, you’re the most beautiful person to me. Stop it. Just stop it.

5. Never, ever lie.
We will probably get over it if we love you, but men are the best lie detectors. We will not make a big fuss about it, though. But when you lie, you are no longer the purest, and coolest person we know. And when you lose this spot, trust me it’s not easy getting it back.

6. Don’t always criticize everything.
A man likes it when someone he loves gives him comments, that’s for sure. But if you always have negative comments about everything he does, that’s a major turn off. I mean about the shoes he got (who cares!) and the way he talked to this person (so?) or the way he wrote that sentence with no structure (are you kidding me?) Please give us some space to be ourselves with no criticism. Negativity is a total no, no.

7. Don’t test us.
When a serious man goes into a relationship, we are either all in, or not at all. Please do not test our limits. Please do not try to trick us to discover whether we like you or not. As long as we’re together, we probably absolutely love you. Some men do not know how to express love in a way that all ladies understand, but we love you for sure if we’re still around. So why test us? I don’t like to always be watched in my every move, do you?

8. Don’t make it all about us.
We loved you when you were alone. But now your whole life revolves around one person; me. Men hate that. Yes, we like to feel super important. But we like it a lot more when you strike a good balance between giving your man a large degree of importance, while having your own time doing your own things or being with your own friends.

9. Be independent, but not too much.

Every man likes a good ego boost. Every man wants to feel needed by his significant other. Every man really needs to have a sense of importance in your life. For me, I love to be with an independent lady; I look up to her, I admire her, and I am proud of her. But I also like it when she needs me to do things for her. I like it when she needs my advice. I love it when she depends on me.

10. Don’t ever make us feel that there are other alternatives.
If there are other alternatives, why are we here? Why are we putting ourselves in this position? And believe me, it is a “position” to be put in. When we feel compared, some of us do not function normally, which might not be a good thing all the time.

The tips I just discussed above are all general; they apply to almost any Middle-Eastern man (maybe even any man at all!) But you will find your own balance in your own relationship. Once you start finding a spot that you are both comfortable in, start building on it. If you have a solid foundation, why would any man walk away?







Tags: Guest writers  Mohamed el dib  Love  Relationships  Relationships 101  Relationship advice  Relationship tips  Relationship problems  Arab relationships  Men   Men vs women  Arab women  Women