September 12, 2013 12:00 AM | by Omar Al Sharif
Intervention for the ICQ Girl
To cut a long story short and to make sure I maintain the privacy of anyone who emails me, below is a summary of one of the emails I received...
A girl who wasted her twenties on a guy who doesn't really know what he wants. For the past ten years he has been in and out, giving her signs that he's interested and then he suddenly disappears and reappears whenever he feels like it. Their families are good friends and she has known him since forever; the words ICQ and Hi5 were mentioned so you know how long ago that was. She shows him she's somehow interested and then once he acts out in a weird way, she keeps her distance and then next time he gets in touch she gives him a cold shoulder. For some reason she can't figure out, she's still stuck onto him. He had mentioned to her before that he wanted to get into a relationship with her but if she would consider loosing some weight and then he disappears again. Recently he appeared again and they started talking, they decided to finally get together, which was his suggestion, but then he disappeared again.
Dear ICQ girl,
ICQ seriously? No seriously? I read that and then I said…ok I am not going to do this. I don’t care how many restaurants the Fustany.com girls are going to treat me to, or how many Miranda Kerr posters I will be getting.
I am kidding! First things first, when I read your three page love disaster, soap opera and Nadia Al Jendi inspired story, I thought she must be kidding. How can someone get himself or herself involved with a person that is clearly not interested? I repeat clearly not interested.
My advice for you goes as follows:
1. Leave now! There is no point of communicating with someone that is abusing your trust. Once he does, he will abuse it once again. Once a player always a player, and by leaving that means no Facebook, no Twitter, no phone calls, no Whatsapping … nothing! Oh, maybe in your case no ICQ. End it right now, the only way you will get around this is if you eliminate him from your social circle and life.
2. He will get back to you…and guess what? You will say “No!" See sometimes we think that our actions will indicate to others what we truly mean. In your case you have to be direct. A clear NO will do it, without giving reasons and without explanations.
3. Did I just read you describing yourself as “FAT”? The first step to having someone love you is to love yourself. Do you hear me?! So either you get comfortable with your curves (a lot of guys love curves in Cairo, I assure you. If Ghada Abdelrazek can call herself sexy, then anyone can). Or, if you are not comfortable with that, then GO TO THE GYM. You have a choice to make, don’t just sit there blaming the universe. Do something about it!
4. Fill your time with new activities. Gym, art classes, helping kids in need, all of those will stop you from over thinking about him and also fill your time with useful things. It will also give you the opportunity to meet someone new; no ICQ required.
5. NO stalking… I am watching you ;)
Ladies, in order to get your love and relationship questions answered, please email me at email@example.com, I'll be there to pass on some wisdom...