December 22, 2013 12:00 AM | by Nada Allam
Tips to Fight the Engagement Blues While Furniture Shopping
So you met the man of your dreams, fell in love with him, and lived a love story like the famous Teenage Dream song by Katy Perry. He gets down on one knee, utters those three words that Chuck and Blair found impossible to say and asks the question every woman dreams of. Feelings flood through your body and you shout out, "Yes, yes, a million times yes." What a wonderful 21st century fairytale right? Wrong!
Since he liked it and put a ring on it, you have officially entered the 'making decisions' zone. From now on, probably till the day you die, you will be making a whole lot of decisions. No, these are not going to be decisions on where to hang out one night or which place to road trip to. You will be making decisions on china patterns, guest seating area, carpet or wood, black or beige towels, L-shaped couch or not, classic or modern…the list really does go on for a good year or so.
Here are a few things to take into consideration as you embark on this new phase:
1. Compromise is Not the Answer
While compromising is a really big part of the relationship, it is not the way to purchase furniture, carpets or even kitchen utensils. If you do compromise, one of you will be staring at an ugly carpet for a really long time, and that is just not fair, now is it?
2. Find Your Style
There is bound to be something out there you both like. If you hate leather couches, and he hates cloth couches, perhaps try something different like suede couches. After all, they give the living room the perfect touch of coziness.
3. Errands is Your Middle Name
You will never find the perfect couch in one, two or even three shopping sprees. You will need to spend months looking for the perfect piece of furniture, and men don't really have such a high tolerance. Establish your style, and head out for the hunt. Don't take your man with you until you have your top 10 options finalized.
4. Love Conquers Stress
The debate on whether or not love conquers all is still on going, but it sure as hell conquers stress. During this stressful period, don't lose sight of date nights. Be sure to include time for one another, go dancing, have some fun and laugh. If anything, so you can regain that energy and start the errands again.
5. Don't Lose Sight of What Is Important
There will be days when you don't agree about anything, and the frustration is all exists in the relationship. You need to exert a whole lot of effort to not let the frustration become you and cause any fall outs. Think about it, is it really worth fighting about a couch?
6. Parents Shouldn't Have the Final Say
While your parents might hate the dinner table, and his parents love it, the decision ultimately lies in your hands; both of you. This table will be in your house, both of you need to feel comfortable with the choice and not feel pressured by families' opinions. Ultimately, while any advice from your parents is golden, this is your home and your relationship, no one, not even the parents should enter your decision bubble. Try to avoid any parent related squabble, as you already have enough on your plate.
7. Express Yourself
At the end of the day, every single chair, cup, fork, and table should reflect your style as a couple. If you are the type of couple that will constantly host breakfasts, be sure to opt for a big table in the kitchen. If you love movie nights, pick an awesome sound system and couch. Let your friends and guests feel that your new home really is a reflection of you.
Why is this phase, well, hard? Because you have two very different people coming together forming a life that is completely out of their own comfort zone. You love big wide cups, he is more of a small cup kind of person, so what type of cups will you be getting? Hint: God made the medium size for a reason.