Love & Relationships

How to Escape the Friend Zone

Zeinab El-Fiqi
8/5/15, 12:00 AM

You know this guy you’ve been introduced to, and liked at first sight? So you became friends, but you still have feelings that go beyond friendship? You found yourself all of a sudden stuck in the friend zone for one reason or another? If you can relate to this scenario and you're tired that he's not making any moves, then I think it’s time we discuss how to escape the friend zone, and what made you stuck in there in the first place.

Why you reached the friend zone?

It's probably because you were afraid to show feelings before getting any sign that he likes you, so you started acting too friendly that you labeled this “thing” a friendship. You do everything together, and you always have an amazing time. There's chemistry and all, but he might just not be looking for a romantic relationship.

How to escape the friend zone?

1. Spark his jealousy.

There is no harm in some jealousy, so to escape the friend zone, put a little threat by letting him know that you like someone. Maybe then, he’ll realize how he feels. If you usually give him lots of attention, you always show up when he really needs you, try to do it less. He probably feels safe around you, which is good, but what’s really bad is if he takes you for granted. He depends on you, and you give him what he emotionally needs, why would he even think of anything more?

2. Make him wonder.

After you try to spark his jealousy, make him wonder! When you're with him, give him your full attention and use your words wisely, and avoid talking to him like you’re one of the guys. Be flirty; give him a challenge to wonder what’s going on. But always be subtle. I don’t believe in shocks or blunt words. It works for some people, but in this case, you really want things to go as smoothly as possible. 

3. Start a healthy routine.

You can change your health and fitness routines, by starting a workout exercise or getting on a healthy diet to revive your whole physical attire. Feeling healthier will make you feel better about yourself, and will boost your physical self confidence. 

4. Make time for your looks.

Now that you made him wonder, it's time for you to really catch his attention. Think of it as mini makeover. I'm not suggesting major changes in your personal looks and style, but just small touches that will boost your self confidence. Try a new hairstyle, or go for a new outfit, perhaps a red one, as it tends to grab the attention more.

5. Know your worth.

Now the most important step to escape the friend zone is to focus on yourself. You need to change your mindset and how you perceive yourself. You have to be well aware of your own self worth. Self-confidence is a key to everything and anything you want.

I had an old friend who had a say that actually turned up to be right, she always said “fake it until you make it.” The thing is, you need to believe in yourself, and this will reflect on your attitude, and people are highly affected by attitudes. So if you’re still a shy person, start faking confidence, while you work on yourself and how you actually perceive yourself. Until one day you’ll make it.

6. Drop a hint.

You know what they say, life is too short to wait. If you feel that you're comfortable to take that step to escape the friend zone, drop hints and tell him that you like him. He'll either reply that he's into you too, and this could be the start of something great, or he'll tell you that you're just friends. In the later case, you have to accept it and move on. It's normal to feel hurt after rejection, but don't let that get to you. One day, you'll actually meet the one who'll be worthwhile.


L.O.V.E, a four letter word with so much more behind it. Explore it all in our Love & Relationships section.

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Zeinab El-Fiqi

Since she was a little girl, Zeinab El-Fiqi enjoyed listening to music while she sat down on the floor to write short stories. She always found writing a way to express herself. Growing up, she always...

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