February 29, 2020 11:00 AM | by Luci
Post #93: Finally Talking
Hey lovely readers,
So Faisal and I decided to go for a weekend getaway to Ain El Sokhna, and I was actually very nervous about this trip. I mean it's the first time in a very long time where Faisal and I decided to do something just the two of us, with no friends or buffers.
I was worried there would be a lot of awkward silences, or we'd just try and avoid each other as we would do back home. But, we had A LOT to talk about it, and I was determined to take my therapists advice and try to think about things from Faisal's perspective.
However, when we got to Ain El Sokhna, things took quite a turn!
Faisal: How about we try something else Luci, how about we just forget about everything and just have a fun carefree weekend? Let's enjoy each other for a change!
Me: But, that means we're going to go back to avoiding, and you said that was the problem in the first place!
Faisal: I know, but I'm just so tired of talking, and arguing, it's getting so exhausting and stressful, and days are just passing by, let's just LIVE!
I had to admit, what he was suggesting sounded very tempting, but, a part of me kept saying, "no Luci, don't give in, you need to talk." But, by the time I gathered my thoughts, Faisal had jumped into the pool, with his clothes!
Me: What are you doing?
Faisal: Enjoying myself for a change!
Me: Okay look, I'll make you a deal, let's talk just for an hour, then you can enjoy the rest of your swim and I'll make us some...
Faisal had pulled me into the pool too!
Faisal: I'll make YOU a deal, we'll talk for as long as we stay in this pool. But, the moment we're out, no more talking, and we are going to enjoy the rest of the weekend.
Seemed fair enough, I mean he really did have point about how we should enjoy life more.
We talked for hours in the pool... about everything! And, I have to admit, my therapist was right, thinking about things from his perspective totally worked! Even Faisal mentioned that I seemed to be listening more and having a more open mind! We decided to stop avoiding things from here on then, and that at least one weekend of the month we will dedicate it to us, to our relationship. We even made a list of things we want to do together... it's weird for the first time in a long time I felt I was in a relationship, and I was actually very excited.
Faisal: One last thing before we get out of the pool.
Me: Seriously, we've been talking for four and half hours, I really think we covered everything!
Me: What about them?
Faisal: Well, we never really talked about it. I mean when do we want to have kids, like a timeline. Or, do we even want to have kids at all? I'm quite older than you Luci, and while I'd love to have kids, I'm open to also not having kids and just growing old with you. But, if we want to have kids, we need to discuss a timeline, I don't want to be one of the dads who can barely walk at their college graduation.
Stay tuned for my next post, Saturday at 11:00 AM (Cairo time) to tell you what happened in the rest of that conversation.
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