For the past few weeks there have been a lot of victims of sexual assault speaking up about their cases and sharing a lot of details about their trauma. It takes a lot of courage and strength to open up and talk about such horrifying and painful incidents. Some of the reactions were amazing, supportive and empowering, but there was a shocking number of comments that are plain hurtful with a dose of ignorance. These types of comments, reactions and overall attitude when it comes to sexual harassment need to stop right NOW, because they are not just opinions, they are spreading that ignorance in society while encouraging inhumane behaviors to spread, allowing criminals to get away without punishment, and silencing more victims from speaking up and defending themselves. Most of these comments are very misogynistic, and oppressive, and they need to be removed from our whole dictionaries when dealing with victims of sexual harassment or assault if we ever want improvement or change.
Here are some examples of the common things people say about sexual harassment and assault that need to stop right now:
1. She's lying to become famous.
2. He's an educated person/in a respectable position, he would never do that.
3. If she was a decent person she wouldn't have allowed this to happen.
4. He might've misunderstood her actions as encouragement.
5. This happened so long ago, why is she bringing it up again now?
6. How can you say that and ruin your/your family's reputation.
7. Men too get harassed but we never make a big deal out of it.
8. She's not even pretty for someone to harass her.
9. She's dressed like she's asking for it.
10. Why did she even meet him alone?
11. She's too young for someone to even look at her.
12. He's much older than her, he'd never think of her in a sexual way.
13. Women can't even be raped because her vaginal muscles wouldn't allow penetration if she doesn't want to.
14. But guys normally do that... it's natural.
15. He's also a victim because he's sexually frustrated and couldn't control himself.
16. You should forgive him and let it go, he has a bright future ahead of him.
17. That story doesn't even make sense, that place is too crowded/it was too early.
18. You shouldn't shame him like that, it'll ruin his life.
19. They are both in the wrong.
20. If she was religious, it would've never happened.
21. Where's your proof?
22. But you look normal, if it actually happened, it would've showed.
23. Maybe he's mentally unstable.
24. No, you must've misunderstood the situation, that's not what he meant.
25. He wouldn't do that, she must've seduced him.
26. Why are you making a big deal out of it, you should just stay quiet.
27. Why don't you consider marrying him instead of making a scandal.
28. He's her husband, he's allowed to do whatever he wants with her.
29. He wasn't sober, he didn't know what he was doing.