Do Couples' Controlling Families Affect Their Relationships? The Answer Is Right Here!

When it comes to our own relationships with our other halves, our families tend to get insecure, anxious, and, in some cases, controlling to the extent that they could ruin them! That said, we’ll show you how families’ interferences in one’s relationships can affect them and to what extent, so keep reading.

9 Signs You're Having An Emotional Affair … And What To Do About It!

Signs that you have a controlling family

Interference in almost every aspect of your life

Interfering with your fashion choices, school projects, and group activities is one of the obvious symptoms of a controlling parent. This can start in preschool and go on all the way through college, and even afterwards. They desire to have an impact on you and participate in all of your decisions. They may even consider not including them in your life obnoxious and rude.

Receiving criticism all the time

“Why do you wear colors like these; they make you look fat.” “Is your house always cluttered and untidy?” Can you relate to any of these comments? If you do, then unfortunately, you do have controlling parents who interfere with your life and criticize you all the time. What’s worse is that they do this in front of your partner, which is more embarrassing.

You never meet their expectations

Controlling parents place a great deal of pressure on their kids to live up to their expectations, which are frequently unrealistically high. They find anything less than flawless to be unsatisfactory or disappointing. This can be in every aspect of your life, including your education, choice of career or partner, and everything else.

Their love is conditional

Withholding affection as a tactic of manipulation, controlling parents frequently do when their high expectations aren't fulfilled. Holding back love, affection, or approval when you don’t meet their standard is a sign of a controlling parent. One example of conditional love is when your parents only give you hugs or compliment you when you receive excellent grades. This is a controlling parent you’re dealing with here.

They show no empathy or respect

When you’re raised by controlling parents, don’t expect to be treated with empathy or even respect for who you are. It can be quite difficult to be a child of such a parent because they frequently don't accept cues about appropriate behavior and personal space. Things become worse when you’re leading a family of your own who happens to witness your controlling parents’ actions.

10 Things to Do Every Day to Make Your Marriage Flourish

Consequences of having controlling families on you as a couple

Embarrassment and isolation

Since your parents tend to disrespect and embarrass you often in front of others, especially your partner, you’re more likely to be embarrassed by their presence. This will lead to you refusing to go to family gatherings or outings to avoid being disrespected. You’d rather isolate yourself than be with your controlling parents.

Regular quarrels with your partner

Because you’re always trying to please and satisfy your parents, you’ll always worry about those little things that may trigger sassy comments from them. So, you may always be stressed about minor things in your life like how your husband dresses or your kids’ school performance. Although you and your partner may have agreed on these things beforehand, your controlling parent’s interference or comments made you dissatisfied with your choices. So you end up quarreling with your partner on trivial matters just because they don’t appeal to your parents.

Clashes with your partner and your family

Not only can your parents’ interference in your life affect your relationship with your partner, but he may also hate the idea of visiting or even seeing them again. So he may end up refusing to join you on holiday gatherings or weekly family visits. This will surely create tension between the two families and you’ll end up being torn between them.

50 Questions To Ask on The First Arranged Marriage Meeting!

How to stop your family from affecting your relationship?

Take ownership of your life

Try to understand more about who you truly are. An excellent place to begin this process is with therapy. What are your beliefs, interests, and objectives? What makes you happy? Recalling the activities you enjoyed as a child before being forced to go a different route might be beneficial.

Set some boundaries

This may require some effort, particularly if your growing up was marked by a lack of limits. The best strategy for dealing with them is to set clear, firm, and constant boundaries. Although this may seem frightening, you must do this in order to escape this unhealthy routine.

Communicate your needs to your parents

It can be intimidating at first to establish yourself, particularly if you've never taken the lead before. Make your requests clear, for example, if your parents are used to visiting your house without notifying you, say this: “The next time, please give me a heads-up before you drop by my house.”

Get back up if needed

It is crucial to have a strong community to support yourself. You may benefit from having dependable outsiders in your corner to listen to you, offer consolation and validation, and even speak up for you when necessary. Doing this with the assistance of a friend or relative that your parents value can be extremely helpful.

It's not easy to have a controlling parent, and the effects might last a long time, especially if you have a family on your own. The controlling actions of your parents may affect your relationship and cause problems. So, ensure that you face them properly to keep your small family happy and stress-free.