Fustany Talks: What Happened When Mom Stopped Taking Care of My Hair

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Find more of our own stories here at Fustany's Diary.

Every day when I look in the mirror while styling my hair, I start to remember my childhood vividly, how my mother took care of these things instead of me, and how I wanted to grow up quickly so I can start taking care of myself. As a kid, I was very surprised to see my school friends doing different hairstyles, talking about how they sat under their mothers while they gave them these hairdos and how many hairpins it took to keep it steady. As for me, I always had a simple hairdo like a ponytail or braids, it didn't take any pain or time from me or my mom, she didn't even use that much bobby pins. 

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I didn't understand why wasn't like my girlfriend's moms and so I even decided to ask her why one time. Her response was, "You're still young and your hair is weaker, unable to these hairdos. They will definitely drop and hurt your head." She even said, laughing, "You get bothered by me putting on one hair tie, let alone more than one and a pin." Her words were convincing, not because I knew or understood how these hairdos would harm my hair, but because I really didn't like having on hair ties and feeling like something bound my head.

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I also remember my mom had her own approach to hair care that all the moms in our family made fun of. Ever since I was a kid, I have always been against the use of any unnatural shampoos, for haircare products. Although using natural hair care products was not very popular at the time, I was following this approach before it became a trend followed by millions today. Everyone was surprised that my mom only used natural shampoo that she went to make herself at the Ataar. She didn't put on any kinds of creams on my hair, only two drops of natural coconut oil. And despite the fact that I didn't like its scent - yes I don't like the smell of coconut - she insisted, telling me this would help make my hair stronger and give it a nice shine. I guess at the time no one understood what my mother was doing except her. Everyone at the time was showing off brands of creams and shampoos, but my mom was totally indifferent.

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I admit that I wasn't like other children. My hair didn't exude the smell of hair cream, nor was it decorated with a hundred pins. My mom was convinced that my hair must have the freedom to grow healthily. The only thing she'd agree with my girlfriends' moms on is the 'No haircut' rule. That rule was so strict, that my hair grew even longer than my waist when I was younger and it really bothered me. She would only cut a few inches off the ends of my hair, telling me that it's only a 'trim' so that your hair will grow back healthy.

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Everything my mom did was strange and unfamiliar, but it was amazing. I only understood its benefits when I got a little older and started to take over. I decided to change all of this, so I used so many different shampoos, the best hair creams, and even more products. The only thing that stuck with me was not pulling my hair back into complex hairdos. I tried different haircuts and dyed my hair, but of course the results were far away from when my mom used to take care of my hair. It was now brittle, dry and frizzy. 

I did not want to admit that what my mother was doing was right, so I went to the easiest solution, which is blow drying and straightening. Things got worse. After several attempts that lasted for years and all ended in failure, I went to my mother and asked her to tell me about the hair care routine she used on me when I was younger. She told me exactly what she was doing and what the benefit of everything she did was. Also to my surprise, she inherited these tips from her mother, and my mother has incredible hair, that I, to this day, wish I had.

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Today, I use my mom's haircare routine and the results are amazing. Of course my hair has not regained its full strength, health and shine, but it's a long process that takes patience and effort, that's what my mom told me. Today, I do the necessary hot oil treatment before washing my hair, I only use natural shampoo and conditioner, and I completely stay away from any hair products with chemicals. The only thing I still can't stop doing is staying away from hairdryers and straighteners. But I can tell you today that's been a month and I haven't used any heat. Do you think it will last?

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