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Your Friend Is Dating Your Ex? Here’s What to Do to Get Over The Awkwardness…
Undoubtedly, one of the most shocking news to you would be that one of your friends is dating your ex. You probably feel hurt, betrayed, and unable to process that this is actually happening. We totally understand what you’re going through and we want to help you overcome this situation. That’s why we’ll tell you how to get over the awkwardness of your friend dating your ex.
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Talk to Your Friend
No matter how long you try to avoid getting in contact with your friend, you must make an effort to do so. It’ll be a great chance to know what she’s feeling and thinking. Most likely, she isn’t attempting to harm you on purpose. Even our closest friends can behave inappropriately and make mistakes sometimes. Maybe she feels self-conscious, insecure, or scared of losing you too! Moreover, perhaps this is a friendship that you need to end. Until you have a heart-to-heart conversation, you will never know. Share your feelings with her. Respect one another's feelings. She deserves to be heard just as much as you do.
Ask Her Not to Mention Him
This is your friend we’re talking about, so although what she did was shocking, she’s still someone you care about and love being around. Since you’re likely to see each other constantly, you have to figure out a way to stay close to her without having your feelings hurt. It's wise to steer clear of chats about your ex if they make you feel bad. Speak to your friend and ask her to refrain from discussing her current relationship if possible. By doing so, you might be able to keep your friendship and feel better overall.
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Never Say She’s Not Allowed to Date Your Ex
Just so you know, there isn’t a rule that prevents your friends from dating your exes! You have to realize this even though you’re hurting. Maybe it’s meant to be for him and her to be together and find the happiness that you two couldn’t find. Moreover, you run the risk of damaging your friendship and your friend's feelings if you tell her she can't date your ex. The chance for your friend and ex to find happiness may also be destroyed. Accept that their relationship isn't supposed to make you feel jealous or depressed; this will help you keep your emotions under control.
Don’t Badmouth Your Ex
The moment you know that your friend is seeing your ex can make you feel the impulse to trash-talk your ex or ruin the relationship. However, in the end, this can just contribute to damaging your friendship. Before revealing any facts about your ex to your friend, such as the specifics of your relationship or your ex's prior relationships, be cautious. Consider whether spreading this information will result in any positive impacts. Think twice before trash-talking your ex because in most cases it’s useless. Whether you’re trying to warn your friend or end their relationship, you’ll be seen as the bad guy. Let her see for herself.
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Don’t Try to Get Back at Your Ex
Whether you broke up with your ex a month or a year ago, him dating someone else means that he’s moved on. So, trying to get back at him is unnecessary, let alone childish. If, for example, you think that dating one of his friends will make him sore, you’re mistaken. He’s probably moved on and trying to live a normal life, while you’re obsessing over getting back at him. It’s just a waste of time.
Acknowledge Your Feelings
Don’t play tough and act like you’re not at all affected by this news. Denying or ignoring how you really feel is unhealthy and can lead to worse consequences. Allow yourself to express your feelings on the breakup by sobbing or screaming into a pillow. Avoiding unpleasant emotions can make you feel angry or depressed for longer. Allowing yourself to experience the feelings associated with the news of your friend and ex will help you move past it more quickly than suppressing them.
Remind Yourself Why You Broke Up
You might gain a better understanding by evaluating the relationship objectively. Consider the reasons why you initially broke up with your ex. It's possible that the relationship didn’t work out for either of you because you are not compatible, and were never meant to be. If this person was making you happy, you’d still be together. So, obviously, you broke up because you were not satisfied with him or the relationship.
Take all the time you need to process what’s happening and reevaluate your relationship with your friend. If you don’t feel comfortable or ready to be around your friend, it is best to distance yourself for a while. Stop texting, calling and hanging out with your friend. However, if you attend the same school or work at the same place, it is best to tell her that you need some space until you’re ready. Keeping your distance from her new relationship may help you avoid feeling jealous or upset. It might be advisable to stay away from both of them until you feel better about it if you still have a lot of bad feelings about it. You may also unfollow both of them on social media to have some peace of mind.
Spend Time With Other Friends
Take this chance to spend time with other friends to take your mind off the whole thing. Being surrounded by your friends will help you overcome this situation and make you feel a lot better. Furthermore, you can discuss the situation with your friends, especially if you need to get it off your chest.
Rekindle Your Friendship Once You’re Ready
When you're no longer upset about your friend dating your ex, reconsider the situation and reach out to her. You may even try to build a relationship with your ex to avoid awkward situations in group gatherings. Let your friend know that you’re ready to hang out with her again, even if it’s been a while.
Picturing your friend and ex together is tough. If you’ve been put in a similar situation, we want you to know that it’s absolutely okay to feel angry, jealous, and even sad. However, since you broke up with your ex already, you need to evaluate the situation and think clearly about what you need to do and how you’re going to deal with your friend to avoid awkward encounters.
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